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Teaching Behavior, Building Character.
At NIS, we believe that behavior, like academic learning, can be taught, practiced, and improved.
When students make mistakes, our goal is not simply to stop the behavior in the moment. We want students to understand the impact of their actions, take responsibility, repair harm, and develop the skills needed to make better choices in the future.
If a child does not yet know how to behave, we must teach them, just as we would teach reading, writing, or mathematics.
Mr. Matthew Parr, Head of School
This philosophy forms the foundation of our restorative approach to student behavior. By focusing on accountability, relationships, and personal growth, we help students develop the social and emotional skills they need to succeed both in school and throughout their lives.
Learn More About Our Approach
Download our Restorative Justice Guide to learn more about how restorative practices are used at NIS and how families can support these approaches at home.
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What is a Restorative Approach?
A restorative approach to student behavioral issues focuses on repairing harm and rebuilding relationships rather than simply assigning punishment. When a mistake occurs, students are supported in understanding what happened, how others were affected, and what actions are needed to make things right. The goal is not to avoid consequences, but to ensure that consequences are meaningful, connected to the behavior, and promote learning.
By using a restorative approach to behavior issues, students learn to:
- Take responsibility for their actions
- Understand the impact of their behavior on others
- Develop empathy and self-awareness
- Resolve conflict constructively
- Rebuild trust within their community
Rather than asking only, "What rule was broken?" restorative practices also ask, "Who was affected?" and "How can the harm be repaired?"
Restorative Approach Does Not Mean "No Consequences"
One of the most common misconceptions about a restorative approach is that it eliminates consequences. It does not. At NIS, students are held to high standards of behavior and are expected to take responsibility for their choices. Restorative practices help ensure that consequences are connected to the impact of the behavior and contribute to learning and growth.
When students engage honestly in the restorative process, they are given opportunities to repair harm and rebuild trust. However, when behavior is repeated or serious, or when a student chooses not to participate meaningfully in the restorative process, additional disciplinary measures may be necessary. These may include parent involvement, formal behaviour plans, loss of privileges, suspension, or expulsion in the most serious circumstances.
Our responsibility is both to support individual growth and to maintain a safe and respectful environment for all members of the community.
Accountability Matters
Accountability Through Action. Students are expected to actively participate in the process of making things right. A restorative response typically involves three stages:
Acknowledge
the Harm
Students reflect on what happened and recognize how their actions affected others.
Repair
the Harm
Students take meaningful steps to make things right. This may include a conversation, an agreement, or another appropriate action.
Rebuild
Trust
Students commit to future behavior and work to rebuild trust within the relationship or community.
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Supporting the Student Who Has Been Harmed
An important part of a restorative approach is supporting the student who has been harmed. Restorative practices are not only about helping the student who caused harm understand their actions. They are also about making sure that the student who was harmed feels heard, supported, and safe.
When harm occurs, we take the time to understand the experience of the affected student. We listen to what happened from their perspective, consider the impact it has had on them, and ask what they need in order to feel safe and move forward.
Depending on the situation, this support may include:
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Regular check-ins with a trusted adult
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Support from our wellbeing team
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Changes to routines, spaces, or interactions where appropriate
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Opportunities to share how they have been affected
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Clear agreements and boundaries to help them feel safe
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Ongoing follow-up to make sure that the situation is improving
It is also important to understand that a restorative approach does not require a student who has been harmed to forgive, become friends with, or immediately rebuild a relationship with the student who caused the harm. A restorative conversation between students will only take place when it is appropriate and when students are ready to participate.
Repairing harm can look different in different situations. It might mean an apology, a change in behavior, an agreement about future interactions, rebuilding trust over time, or simply creating the space and boundaries needed for everyone to feel safe at school.
Most importantly, the responsibility for repairing harm does not sit with the student who was harmed. The student who caused the harm is expected to take responsibility for their actions and demonstrate change. The school’s responsibility is to support that process while continuing to protect the well-being, safety, and dignity of the student who has been harmed.
Partnering with Families
Supporting positive behavior is a shared responsibility between school and home. There may be times when families do not see the full picture of a situation. Just as parents have insights into their child's experiences outside of school, educators and students may have perspectives that are not always visible at home.
At the same time, schools have a responsibility to protect the privacy and dignity of all students. This means there may be circumstances where we cannot share every detail of a situation. Our commitment is that every concern is handled thoughtfully, fairly, and professionally, always with the well-being of students at the center of our decision-making. Open communication, mutual trust, and strong partnerships with families are essential to this process.